Alone [07 Jun 2003|12:27am] [ mood | gloomy ] [ music | Pink Floyd - Another Brick In The Wall ] Here is an appropiate extract from a poem by the E.Brothers I am dying. Without my love, dying. The strength that flowed through my veins drains away, and I am collapsing into a solitary collection of ruination. Acid tears burn my skin, drown my eyes. Here is the fear of loneliness, the truth of terrifying demise. The realization, the deadly certainty, the cool, calm, collected acceptance of eternal solitude. Warmth, company, laughter, love; all are ethereal and harshly transient The clear reality of eternal damnation to the distant recesses of the coldest, loneliest realm of blackness. Now I'm just in this slump right now...so noone need worry. post comment

Worried [31 May 2003|01:11am] [ mood | worried ] [ music | Bright Eyes - Bowl Of Oranges ] After a nice night with a good friend of mine, I am left feeling rather concerned for his wellbeing. Like myself, he has had it tough with his father and has recently been in contact with him. Although he usually is easy to talk to about most things, tonight he was very closed up about the topic of him and his father. To be expected, considering the current circumstances. A failed attempt to get him pissed led us with a few minutes for me to run home and obtain his bag of bread. Nothing suss, I gave him the bread...I work at a bakery...I guess in time, when Ewan is ready to talk about the matter (hopefully soon), I plan on being there for him. I guess this is a pledge to be there for him, like he was there for me (throughout my emotional ordeal with the folks). This isn’t a matter of paying him back for his courtesy towards me, we are friends and friends are there for each other. I think that's about it for now. 1 comment|post comment

A Beginning [28 May 2003|10:55pm] [ mood | calm ] [ music | Evanescence - My Immortal ] It is amusing that my first journal is one that can be read by anyone in this world armed with time, patience and of course a computer and the internet. Nevertheless, my goal here is really to straighten out many things troubling me in my life. Through this I will try to be as honest as possible. I'm not expecting a huge turnout of interest for my little existence...It so happens that this is the first real means by which I’ve consolidated my thoughts, feelings and emotions onto a platter for others to observe. My friends think I am bottled-up and quiet. Unfortunately I can’t pitch for the strong silent type here, so I will have to explain myself. The various stages and struggles of my life I will leave for another time and instead post this damn entry already. Goodnight dear void. 3 comments|post comment

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